Hooray! It's the weekend and we're just hangin' out.

Awash in bodily fluids...

The sad day has come. Little man woke up sick this morning. I told myself again and again that this would happen once he started day care, and that we've been really lucky on the health front overall, but that still doesn't prepare you for how heart-wrenching it is when such a little body produces such a horrible cough. And he was so sad and cuddly and sick that it took me a few minutes to notice the yucky ooze coming out of his diaper and all over the crib. So began the day.

Joel had to stay home with Dexter since I burned through most of my sick days last year on maternity leave, so I kissed the guys and headed out. Ten minutes into my first class of the day one of my lovely juniors puked all over the floor. I felt sorry for the baby, but this kid was not sick due to illness. I am hoping that the fact that all the girls in class now think he is disgusting will dissuade him from doing that again. Nothing says "Prom Date!" like a guy who is vomiting green liquor at 9 in the morning.

Catching up

Well, I am officially back at work which means the posts will probably slow down for a while, but in the meantime, here is a quick re-cap of our weekend.

First, how many new parents does it take to photograph a social outing?
Turns out like five of us! The poor kids now know what it is like to be stalked by Paparazzi.

The next day I spent a relaxing afternoon at my Dad's. Rory decided to join Cathy for a quick reading of the Sunday paper.

Finally, I think I've already told you about Little Man's attachment to the vile smelling Joey. I purchased a few back ups on eBay, but decided that three out of four needed to go in the wash this afternoon. Dex quickly found where I'd stashed them and was in hog heaven as he tried to shove all three in his mouth at the same time. But he can quit anytime. Seriously...he's not an addict.

The Piano Lesson

Too much pressure on such a little guy?

Well, Dex is completing his first week of daycare and he's already the Teacher's Pet! The kindergarten teacher spends her mornings with the babies, and she has told me two days in a row that he is her favorite baby. She is young and very cute, so I am impressed already with his way with women.

This is the last day of my vacation. Oh oh oh... (I am cursed with always hearing songs in my head.) Yesterday was Dexter's first day at daycare. We were both slightly traumatized by the end of the day, but Joel tells me that we are all going to live through it so I guess I'll believe him. The good news is that I am in school supply heaven, although I have scaled down a bit this year. I am quite proud of my restraint, but I am not sure if Joel thinks this is very "scaled down". This year for school I only bought:
10 packs of markers (.60 a piece. I missed the really good sale at Target. That is second best.)
20 glue sticks
3 packages of pencils
1 pretty notebook
1 planner
5 blank wall charts
1 roll of bulletin board paper
1 stamper
1 bookbag
1 package of 811 stickers
No borders! No fancy pens! No motivational posters that say things like "Hang in there" with a kitty dangling from a tree branch!

I don't know how I'll survive on such meager reserves, but this is the new me. (Insert eyerolling emoticon here.)

Guess who stopped eating sand?

Word weary

Lately I see a lot of people using “can not” as two words instead of “cannot”. I have read some grammar sites excusing this and saying it is for emphasis. I think they’re wrong. I know language evolves, but I hate when it evolves due to laziness or mistakes. Another frustrating example is the misuse of the word “troops”. According to most dictionaries, a "troop" is a group of soldiers or a unit of soldiers. “Troops” are several units of soldiers. The American Heritage Dictionary even states specifically that one definition of troop is “at least five Boy Scouts or Girl Scouts under the guidance of an adult leader”. See? Five! (Well, at least when referring to Scouts.) Yet somewhere along the lines American politicians and journalists began to use “troop” to mean “soldier”. For instance: “Three troops were injured in last night’s attack.” Were fifteen soldiers injured or three? When I hear that usage on the news or radio it is as if a herd of elephants is dancing on a Styrofoam. Broadcasters on NPR and The News Hour have even made this mistake recently. On the other hand, perhaps I should save my ire for the foreign policies and political grandstanding that are keeping us in this war rather than the language used to describe it.

Edited to add: OK, I suppose there are rare and awkward instances of "can not" being correct. ("We just don't have enough money to go out to dinner this weekend." " Well, we can NOT go out to dinner this weekend.") Correct but awkward. I still say stick with cannot.

The FUN of dysfunction...

is the four cakes you get because you celebrate your birthday separately with your mother, father, mother-in-law, and father-in-law.

Another vacation???

So this week our trip was to Holland, Michigan to stay with Joel's Dad at the cottage he rented. On our way down we stopped at Culvers where Joel ordered a "Bacon Butter Burger". Ew.

Then we spent some days lounging on the beach. It was windy, but fun.

32

Although I have spent several years as a consumer and a collector: I have bought gadgets, stored party supplies in the basement, and built a rather extensive collection of placemats and Christmas decorations, I am slowly turning over a new leaf.

I am trying to live more simply. This is a personal choice; just for me. It feels good to let go of things that I don’t need and won’t use. My house is plenty big for three people and yet there are times when our stuff leaves me feeling not just crowded, but frankly claustrophobic. I am taking a variety of steps to improve this. One step, as regular readers will know, was the yard sale in July.

Then I came across this from Suze Ormon:
“Financially speaking, I can't make any sense out of garage sales. You have to invest a lot of time to hold one, when you could simply take all your unwanted stuff down to the local charity (or even ask them to come cart it away for you) and claim the donation as a tax deduction. Do you really want to spend a weekend holding a garage sale-with no guarantee you will clear out everything you don't want-when you can spend an hour or two gathering up your stuff and making a donation whose tax value will likely exceed the value of your garage sale's proceeds?”

I get her point, but for my purposes I respectfully disagree. I couldn’t just immediately pack everything away and take it to St. Vincent DePaul’s. I wanted to get rid of the stuff that I accumulated without a second thought, things that I purchased with hard-earned money that I used once and never again. To pack it up in a car and ship it immediately off to someone else would be perpetuating the exact need for instant gratification that filled up my drawers and closets in the first place. Instead, I put effort into going through the house and making decisions about items that weren’t necessary to a happy, fulfilled existence. Sitting in the yard all day with strangers pawing through my belongings left me with plenty of time to focus on my new goal of removing the chokehold my “stuff” was beginning to have on my life. By the time I finally packed the car to donate the remaining items, I was exhausted! ... but I also felt a sense of freedom and accomplishment. I have spent all summer letting the question “Will this end up in next year’s yard sale?” guide my purchases. However, lest you think this goal is anything less than a work in progress please note that I bought two back issues of Sassy magazine on eBay the same week as the sale.

A perfect day

It has been about a perfect day. First Dexter and I spent the morning with our friends at the pool.

Do you know how hard it is to get five kids to look at the camera at the same time?

Then we went and saw a former student off to school. Afterward Joel and I enjoyed a bit of grown up drinking. Aren't they pretty?


Then Joel played ball with his little boy. I think Dexter enjoyed it. What do you think?

Dexter learns to multi-task

So Dex doesn't really use a pacifier anymore. Instead he sleeps with this baby kangaroo in his mouth. It is the most disgusting & smelly thing ever at this point, but it comforts him so I am not worried about breaking the habit yet.

Recently he figured out that he can crawl and still carry around his favorite toy. We're going to teach him to get the newspaper next.

And before you get on my case about the wife beater t-shirt, keep in mind that we don't have central air. Also, how else is a southside guy supposed to show off his muscles?

Dex is on the move (usually)

So Dex is moving around at a rather brisk pace lately. His crawling gets faster everyday but that isn't enough for him. He wants to stand. Gone are the days of Dexter being cute and mommy running for the camera. He requires constant vigilance or else he will eat a gym shoe, crawl up the side of the stroller or dive head first into the fire place. So I had to catch a snap shot when the opportunity presented itself. Pretty boy.

One fun thing I learned how to do this weekend...

Joel's hypothesis

Joel stands by the theory that the phrases "spank my booty" or "spank my big ol' booty" fit perfectly somewhere into almost any song ever. He tests this theory at least five times a day. If you are shy about trying it for yourself, just spend ten minutes with him and he'll prove it to you.

This one time at yearbook camp...

Wow! I was at yearbook camp this weekend. I learned a whole lot about Adobe indesign, but it was a scary, scary weekend. The scary part was what a glimpse into my own adolescence it was. I was exactly that type of nerdy, extroverted, quirky, insecure girl that were all over the place this weekend. (Except without the ninja graphic design skills that many of these girls had.) There was a whole lot of giggling. There were some cheers. There was a little bit of rewriting movie quotes so they fit the yearbook theme. ("Deadlines? We don't need no stinkin' deadlines." or "As tif" and "Al-write-y then". For real, I am not kidding.) I must say my sense of irony and my propensity for sarcasm have returned, but I tried to set a good example for my students. (Though I didn't make them do cheers.) I was really happy to get home today; I missed the little man. Still, I did learn a lot of super-cool bells and whistles to use in the yearbook and got a lot of sleep and a little planning for school so that's good news.

Fed up with his mamarazzi, Dex takes matters into his own hands.

Uh oh...

The boys are starting to climb.

Why I am having trouble posting...

I've lost my ability to be sarcastic! I can't think of much to write about that doesn't sound absolutely sappy. I am having the best summer and I just walk around feeling tremendously lucky all the time. I miss my ranting ability, but I don't miss my overwhelming need to be sardonic. In fact, losing irony has allowed me to appreciate some things that I would have outwardly scorned before: RVs, yard sales, singing Elmo dolls, baby clothes with dogs on them. Just don't go buying me a Precious Moment for my birthday. I haven't completely lost my mind.

Fessin' Up

I learned the truth about Santa Claus because, when snooping around for Christmas presents, I stumble across items that later were put in my stocking. Even still if I know where Joel hid my birthday present I will look. I don't want to but I do.

Last week I tried to play cool as a cucumber and waited a few days to buy The Deathly Hollows. Then I have been so busy I haven't been able to really sit down and read it. So...since I wanted "the best possible information", I headed to Wikipedia and looked up the Harry Potter spoilers. Kinda pathetic, no?

Two years!

Today I have been meandering here for two years. (Though some might say lately not so much.) I have been being weird for much longer.

Professor Barr expresses frustration over his mommy's liberal use of parentheticals.

Gone Fishin'

See you Monday!

"Brassy Dame"

I was sent a survey from the St. Ignatius alum website last week. Apparently there is a woman writing her dissertation on perceptions of red heads. I had to answer a few questions about my opinion of red-headed people. (I have to admit the survey was a bit loaded...but being married to a red head, I did my best to skew her results.) Still, I am tempted to send her this adorable picture of Lennie from yesterday and ask her if this is what she had in mind when she asked if I thought red headed females are sassy? Happily, Dexter has decided that "points at me and giggles" and "steals away toys you just gave to me" are two traits he is looking for in a woman.

Neighborhood fun

Dexter loves to swing. We do what we are told.

Well, we here at the Clampett household had a good time at our yardsale today. Many of the things I thought would sell like hot cakes are packed in the car ready to take to Salvation Army, and the things I almost didn't put out sold in minutes. Go figure. Anyway, looks like I'll get that pedicure, but I'll spare you the picture of my toes.

We're havin' a yard sale, y'all!

In an admirable attempt to clean the basement I am having a yard sale tomorrow. What is for sale: Lots of candles that used to reside in crappy apartments, mismatched kitchen ware, George Foreman grill, clothes in much smaller sizes than big mama can fit into these days, some furniture, and my dignity.

Not for sale: 1. anything that has ever belonged to Joel or been touched by Joel or even breathed on by Joel, ever. 2. the Baby.

I hope to make enough money to get a pedicure. The dogs are startin' to look Grandpa Welch yucky.

Thwarted in their attempt at a quick escape, the boys try to get by with their most innocent expressions.

Holy Mackerel is this a sad movie!

Hey! Some reviews!

Hooray! I finished some books! I visited the three for two table at Borders. So far I finished The Virgin of Small Plains by Nancy Pickard. It is always nice when a book you don't suspect much from takes you by surprise. It was a great suspense/ romantic novel. I could figure out what was happening pretty early on, but it was still an absorbing read. Currently I am reading Absurdistan by Gary Shteyngart. It was also from the three for two table at Borders. Based on some on-line reviews it seemed like a funny read so I chose it for the neighborhood book club book. So far I am disappointed. It seems kind of misogynistic. It might be ironic or for character development, but so far I am not in love. It also seems to be a bit of a rip off of A Confederacy of Dunces.

Tonight I am watching Night at the Museum with the Boston Barrs. I really was bummed when Anna suggested it as a rental choice, but I am pleasantly surprised. It is funnier and has more of a plot than I thought it would.

Although those were all things I enjoyed, nothing beats a little prunes and oatmeal.

Vacation Fun

He'll be leaving for college before I know it...

St. Nora of the Drama Queens

Jennifer was recently writing about her long history with Wonder Woman. But she also mentions another Strong Girl Family Favorite.
Picture Book of Saints.

I don't know how many hours my sisters and I spent poring over this epic tome. I chose the confirmation name Cecelia because she had the prettiest picture in the book. Seriously. We also would "Play Saints". My favorite to play was St. Agnes. She was tied up and starved (if memory serves) because she wouldn't marry Sempronius' son. First he tried to burn her at the stake but the fire wouldn't touch her so he immediately beheaded her. Anyway...I might have to pick up a copy for some light summer reading.

Dexter and Zach are working hard to keep the band together. Sometimes their creative differences cause some problems, but harmony prevails.

So Dexter was successfully Christened on Sunday. It was a nice service and a great party afterward. Dex is blessed to be part of several families who are kind and generous and a lot of fun.

6.26.04

Three years ago I made a pretty smart move.



Happy Anniversary Babe.